Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
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