He told me they were just razor bumps!
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
We are two peas in an std pod
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize