Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
