i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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