did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
