maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
