you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
