goodnight i made you a song goodbye
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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