Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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