Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize