I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
