I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.