Fuck appropriateness.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
