He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
