My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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