i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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