That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
