We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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