I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
