dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
