oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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