He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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