i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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