And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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