Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
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