Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I'm passing your future prison.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
