remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
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