Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Just pee around me
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
