My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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