I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
