no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
She said her name was "party"
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
