you win again, gameday.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
