its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
