But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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