Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize