4 words: hood of his car
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize