make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
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