Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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