last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
