ya dads aren't the best wingmen
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
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