ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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