And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
