i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
