Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize