have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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