oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
