chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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