you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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