would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
