Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
then he tried to convert me to islam
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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